Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Drawing Lines


One of the most brilliant things I’ve seen in a while was posted in my Facebook wall today, and I feel inclined to share.  It is a feminist parody of Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” video, called “Defined Lines.”  From the initial “#EVERYBIGOTSHUTUP” to the guys in tighty-whities and awesome lyrics, this video is definitely pure win. Seriously, everyone needs to see this... 

Robin Thicke's song “Blurred Lines” has received a plethora of exposure lately, especially considering "his" recent VMA performance.  I put "his" in quotes, because the aspect of that performance that's mostly been discussed has been Miley's contribution, including her ill-fitting costume that made her derriere look less than ideal in close-ups and whatnot.  SIDEBAR: In any further discussion of this incident, I would really appreciate if everyone refrained from using the word “twerking.”  Bending at the waist and shaking does not qualify as “twerking” – anyone who describes it as such clearly doesn’t know what “twerking” is (hint: muscle isolation) and therefore probably should not be using that word to begin with.  But enough about Miley’s behind – let’s talk about the song itself.

“Blurred Lines” has caught a lot of heat both for being “rapey” and having a misogynist video.  The song itself is also as catchy as the clap, so it's everywhere.  Initially, I did not even know the lyrics, save for “YOU DA HOTTEST BITCH IN DIS PLACE” (which I, admittedly, used to yell out whenever it got to that point) – having looked them up, the lyrics can definitely be categorized as creepy, but Thicke alleges that the “Blurred Lines” to which he is referring are not the lines between consensual and non-consensual sex, as has been alleged:
"For me it's about blurring the lines between men and women and how much we're the same," he said. "And the other side which is the blurred lines between a good girl and a bad girl, and even very good girls all have little bad sides to them." http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/09/robin-thicke-blurred-lines-criticism_n_3569560.html
Furthermore, he maintains that the video itself was deliberately misogynist to poke fun at social norms.  Essentially, he’s Pulling a Tosh in the music world.
 “We tried to do everything that was taboo. Bestiality, drug injections, and everything that is completely derogatory towards women. Because all three of us are happily married with children, we were like, ‘We're the perfect guys to make fun of this.’” http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/09/robin-thicke-blurred-lines-criticism_n_3569560.html

Truthfully, I was not particularly offended by the song or the video.  Thicke, Pharrell, and T.I. hang out fully clothed amongst (literally) half-naked women as said half-naked women look into the camera and, often, look bored (seriously, I think that I even saw one of them roll her eyes at one point).  The whole thing is just so over-the-top and ridiculous...

Yes, this is actually part of the video...This HAS to be a joke. 

...Plus, as a former avid watcher of TGIF, the novelty of having Jason Seaver’s real-life son tell me that I’m “DA HOTTEST BITCH IN DIS PLACE” cracks me up – EVERY TIME.  Don’t get me wrong – I don’t exactly think that Thicke’s goal with this video was to win the Nobel Peace Prize for his distinguished contributions to social dialogues about gender roles and the repression of female sexuality or anything – the video clearly is what it is to get people talking, to get Thicke exposure, and to sell records.  I can totally understand the controversy behind it and why some people were so offended by it (and I will not post the video itself on my blog out of respect for those people), but, personally, I did not really think much of it.  Maybe it’s because I’m just getting old and tired, because I’ve come to the point where I recognize that, if I were to actually get angry over any and every manifestation of sexism, misogyny, rape culture, and etcetera, I would never, ever stop being completely irate.  Maybe it’s because I grew up listening to Eminem and still actually love his music (despite my feminist world-view and knowledge of the contributions of popular media to social dynamics - yeah, my Eminem appreciation is a whole separate entry), and growing up exposed to this constantly has tremendously desensitized me...Maybe it's because, as I have previously stated, I had such a hard time believing that a guy spelling out crass messages about his genitals with balloons is actually being serious...Either way, the song/video definitely did not bother me as much as it did some other people...

Despite not being particularly offended by the original, I am still so endlessly entertained by this parody.  Please witness the genius for yourself:
WARNING: NSFW: Guys being objectified in underpants and deliberate crass language  - (“You want a box gap?  Show me your six pack.  You want a landing strip?  You’d better get ripped.  I apologize if you think my lines are crass – tell me how it feels to be verbally harassed”)

I think it made an absolutely brilliant statement by flipping deliberate misogyny into deliberate misandry (note:  the misandry is not being condoned, which is a large part of their point), and the lyrics were fantastic.  The absolute highlight was the fact that the guys were not only just willing to do this, but totally committed to their roles and it was hysterically funny... They owned it, and I want to give each and every person involved in this video an enthusiastic and heartfelt high-five.  Seriously, I haven’t seen such a fantastic display of gender-flipping to make a point about popular culture since Jenna Marbles did “Bounce That D*ck."  Oh, you haven't seen that one, either?  Consider it your parting gift for this entry!

I shouldn't even have to put a NSFW warning on this one, because anyone who sees the title of this song and seriously thinks that it's family-friendly or something is officially stupid



Until next time, friends!  :)

Monday, August 26, 2013

Slag Swag: In Defense of SlutWalk


On August 10th, 2013, I had the pleasure of participating in SlutWalk DC.  When I had first heard about SlutWalk as a movement, I felt compelled to eventually participate.  Needless to say, I was not left disappointed.  The experience was overwhelmingly positive and empowering, and the organizers clearly worked really hard to make it as inclusive as possible.  I was particularly impressed by this, as (to my understanding) the reason why the SlutWalk NYC movement dissolved was due to a lack of inclusivity.  They covered a range of experiences through their chosen speakers, who included a male survivor, a transgender survivor, a woman who survived (repeated) rape at the hands of her alcoholic husband, a Muslim feminist, and an African American woman discussing how traditional feminist theory was not inclusive of the African American experience – it was genuinely enlightening and the organizers did an amazing job trying to create a safe space for as many people as possible.  I had briefly spoken to the organizers about my confusion regarding the martial arts demonstration (which I interpreted differently than was intended) - then, when a presenter was late, they invited me to come up to the podium and share.  In short, it was amazing and I am so glad that I chose to be a part of it.  Since the SlutWalk movement itself is often fundamentally misunderstood and, therefore, controversial, I feel the need explain and defend it, especially being as my own SlutWalk exploits have been so extraordinary.

First things first - what is SlutWalk?
 
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/38/89/5f/38895f157395517c159fb61c20a8f789.jpg


To directly quote the SlutWalk DC Facebook Event,  


"The goal of "SlutWalk" is to bring together people of all genders, ages, professions, religions, ethnicities, sexual orientations, and economic statuses to create a dialogue and bring an end to attitudes that normalize victim blaming and slut shaming and to ultimately put an end to rape culture." 
  Some participants choose to dress provocatively, or only wear underwear, or even go topless for the sake of proving a point.  This point essentially being that, even if someone is the sluttiest slut who ever did slut, it STILL is not okay to victimize them -  the issue of dress/”sluttiness” is deemed irrelevant and is removed from the equation in regards to placing blame.  While those who know the story behind how the SlutWalk movement started completely understand this and take it within context, others may misinterpret the manner in which some choose to protest, which is precisely why this movement merits explanation.


The initial SlutWalk took place in 2011 at York College (in Ontario, Canada) as a direct reaction to a comment made by Constable Michael Sanguinetti.   As he addressed the issue of campus rape, Sanguinetti stated that,  
“I’ve been told I’m not supposed to say this, however, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized.”  
This attitude is reflective of many misconceptions of our popular culture, and to hear this attitude (once again) being expressed by someone in a position of legal authority is an indication of how deeply entrenched these social attitudes truly are and, therefore, how urgent it is that we address them.  In order to adequately and honestly address the issue of rape (and start the process of ending the silence, shame, and suffering familiar to all too many survivors), we need to start with the truth.


As a society, we’ve come to conceive of rape as something that occurs as a result of strangers hanging out late at night in dark alleys (with weapons, of course).  So we’ve created this whole set of ways to “protect” oneself from getting raped – don’t go out late, don’t drink, don’t do drugs, don’t wear revealing clothes, don’t talk to strangers, etc…but these  “rules” have little to nothing to do with the realities of rape.  For survivors of rape, their attackers were much more often neighbors and friends than strangers – in fact, about 73% of sexual assaults were committed by someone that the victim knew*.  When we look at survivors under the age of 18, the number drastically jumps by twenty percent – 93% the individuals who were victimized as juveniles knew their attacker*.  We caution women against going out late at night, but (in 2001) only 23% of rapes happened between midnight and 6am – 43% were committed between 6pm and midnight, and 33% were committed between 6am and 6pm*.  More than half of all rape/sexual assault incidents occured within a mile of the victim’s home…a full 40% took place in the victim’s own home*.  Furthermore, only 11% of rapes involve the use of a weapon, and attire generally doesn’t play a role in victim selection*.  The fact that we cling to these “safety tips,” despite the fact that our “understanding” of rape has little to no basis in reality, places the responsibility for the attack on the person being attacked.  As a direct result of these misconceptions, many survivors are made to feel that the trauma that they suffered was somehow not “legitimate,” and our culture of victim-blaming facilitates the belief that the entire thing was somehow their fault. 


To dig just a little deeper, let's slap another graphic on here and think a little bit about the word "Slut" and the manner in which it's generally used....
http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/originals/6f/fe/99/6ffe99b1afb47313f74b2335ac8b89f4.jpg
The criteria for "being a slut" are completely random and subject to change at any given moment...A lot of social attitudes about “sluts” serve to create a class of people whom it is okay to victimize (again, shifting responsibility for the crime).  The idea that there are circumstances under which one’s bodily autonomy becomes null and void (especially considering how subjective the circumstances of being called a “slut” are) is absolutely preposterous and heinous.  However, the fear of being arbitrarily designated to this class of individuals who no longer deserve control over their own bodies keeps many survivors from reporting the crimes perpetrated against them.  SlutWalk attempts to remove the power/perceived validity of that label from the equation.


While I acknowledge that, like any movement, there may be elements of SlutWalk that may be flawed and/or misguided, I do believe it to be successful overall.  Essentially, we are using Sanguinetti’s own words against him to not only stand in solidarity with every survivor who has ever been labeled (or been silenced by the fear of being labeled) as a “Slut,” to start dialogues about victim-blaming and rape culture, and to address the common myths surrounding rape and sexual assault in our society.  


Admittedly, I’ve put off writing this entry for several weeks, not only because this experience has been so emotionally charged for me that it was hard to coherently gather my thoughts, but also because of the harsh nature of the criticisms against those who chose to participate in the movement. There was one blogger in particular, whose life accomplishments are evidently limited to sharing the same last name as a (defeated) presidential candidate from 5 years ago, who wanted to make sure that everyone knew that SlutWalk was nothing more than a bunch of angry radical feminists who apparently believe that all men are constantly “objectifying” them with their “male gaze.”  He then proceeded to mostly post about nipples, though, to his credit, he does also mention butt-dimples.  Also, he wants to make sure that everyone knows that a lot of the protesters were ugly by his standards, and, “10% would have made the grade without benefit of serious whiskey consumption.”   He then concludes by chastising a rape survivor for not pressing charges.  Scrolling down, we are treated to a bunch of comments by people who have zero understanding of what feminism or the SlutWalk movement is about – as an added bonus, the blogger himself makes sure to put the phrase “date rape” in quotes to trivialize it, and goes on to postulate, 
“Should we excuse (and thereby encourage) bad decisions and unrealistic expectations by women? Or, if our purpose is actually to prevent rape, shouldn't we view this as a teachable moment and say DON'T BE GETTING DRUNK! STOP HANGING OUT WITH CREEPS!”
...So we have victim-blaming, a dismissal of feminism as “man-hating” coupled with blatant and deliberate objectification, assorted rape myths perpetuated, misunderstandings galore….In short, the necessity of this movement has just been proven by one of its harshest critics.  Cool story, brah.  Tell it again.
 
 I've also come across a fair number of people who simply express confusion, and say something along the lines of, "what's so empowering about dressing like a slut/calling yourself a slut?"  And my answer is as follows:
The empowerment does not come from wearing certain clothing or labeling oneself.  Instead, the empowerment comes from the act of not giving a single modicum of faecal matter about the labels that might be bestowed upon oneself by society, because you know that no label in the whole world excuses predatory behavior.  The empowerment comes from starting and participating in dialogues about rape culture and victim-blaming.  The empowerment comes from dispelling common social myths about rape and giving the proverbial middle finger to the Madonna-Whore Complex that runs rampant through our society.  The empowerment comes from ending the silence and the shame that comes with rape and sexual assault, providing for ourselves a safe forum in which to speak out, telling our respective truths, and beginning to heal.  THAT, my friends, is what is so empowering about SlutWalk...

*note: all statistics provided are courtesy of R.A.I.N.N.